#49: Make new friends

Photo: Conrado / Shutterstock

One of the difficult things I found about coming out of my long-term relationship was the realisation, embarrassing as it is to admit, that I didn't actually have that many of my own friends. Meaning, friends with whom I didn't have to share allegiances with my Ex. Of course I had my long time school/college friends but they're in a different time zone and not part of my day to day life anymore. I met my Ex within 3 months of moving to London and after the 9 years we were together realised that most of my 'friends' were the Ex's to begin (and end) with, or they were mutual.

Don't get me wrong, I love and appreciate our mutual friends and never want them to be caught in the middle. After all a break up is hard for friends too. But within 2 weeks of breaking up with me, the Ex was on the dinner party / social circuit with the new GF in tow (under the guise of 'friends', *cough, puke*) and, fairly or not, I found myself replaced and relegated in our social circle, the odd woman out when new get-togethers were arranged. So not only have I found that I need to start my dating life over, I've also found I need to start most of my social life over as well. (It's my own fault really.)

This is not to say that this has necessarily been a bad thing. As they say, you learn who your real friends are. And on top of that I've met new friends who seem to like me for me. As time goes on I continue to build and grow a new circle of friends -- one that is completely separate from my old life. So I'm happy to say I've met a number of special people who I'm proud to call a new friend. They've been instrumental in helping me move on and establish a new life for myself...not to mention ensuring that I don't forget to enjoy life and have fun.

There are some particularly special people who have been especially important in my life over the last few months. (You know who you are. Know that meeting and spending time with you has meant more to me than you'll ever know.) I'll be forever grateful for the support they've given me and the fun I've had with them through such a difficult time in my life. If there's been one particular positive out of this experience, it's been meeting lovely and wonderful new friends. I look forward to sharing many more fun times with them (and my old friends too) in the future...