#148: Redecorate a room

Photo Credit: Charles Taylor / Shutterstock

I've successfully been able to buy the ex out of the house and, more importantly, been able to stay in my home. It has been my sanctuary since our break up and I'm grateful that I was able to maintain some consistency in my life post-split by keeping the house and my routines and not having to move on top of all the other upheaval I've gone through.

Some time has past, but not enough for the house to feel completely mine. One door has closed and I'm opening a new one, but I'm occasionally taken aback by some memory the house unexpectedly unfolds in front of me. I can be doing something completely mundane, like opening the closet under the stairs and a vision from the past will float across the room like a ghostly apparition. My relationship may be dead but the house is haunted by memories of my past. My ex and I renovated the house together, so literally almost every corner has a story to tell: the chimney breast that had to be scraped for 3 days by hand with a razor blade, causing our hands to cramp in disfigured claw-like fashions; the wobbly windows that were reconditioned and painted; the numerous cans of paint samples that had to be tried and tested in different light conditions. In short, while the house is my sanctuary, it haunts me at times.

I knew at some point I would need to reclaim the space as my own and start building new memories in the house I thought we'd grow old together in, but until recently that was too much for me to take on. When I was ready, I started with my bedroom. I considered swapping rooms, but that wasn't practical. I considered changing the colour, but I liked the colour we chose; it was similar to what I painted my bedroom in NYC when I was single 10 years ago.

So I rearranged the furniture. While that was a good start, getting new sheets and bedding REALLY helped. I bought a new set of high thread count, white cotton sheets/duvet, which now makes me feel pampered and special every night I climb into bed.

Oh and I also started sleeping in the middle of the bed...